Mithridates Vl
Imperfects Public Relations
69
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Posted - 2013.05.28 23:42:00 -
[1] - Quote
As leaders of the mercenary world, the Imperfects are aware that their actions are subject to close scrutiny by all. In acknowledgement of this fact, we are going to great administrative lengths to declassify and share with the public some of our groundbreaking practices, methods and protocols.
This is the Prometheus Initiative. Ensuring that the tools of the Gods are available to you mere mortals, so that you might grow and evolve. The first release is attached.
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/Prometheus_Initiative_0001.psv
/Decoding... Complete.
>Imperfects Declassified Emergency Response Protocols (I DERP)
Good day to you, mercenary hero! Congratulations on your acceptance into the Tomorrow's Imperfects Today program. You're well on your way to becoming a certified TIT.
In your previous lesson, we explained how the electrodes we've attached to your arm can automate trigger presses at superhuman speed... but it's no good being a glorious badass with a Tactical Assault Rifle if you don't know where the enemies are!
Today you will be instructed on communicating strategy and relaying tactical information efficiently in the heat of battle.
Important Considerations:
- Do not allow radio silence until each mercenary has drawn his last breath. Though our communications are encrypted, it is likely that the opponent is scanning the available channels and will use the distinctive pattern of static that an occupied but encrypted channel creates to determine whether you are still in the area. A constant stream of menacing noise will provide an effective reminder that you remain engaged with the enemy and is a recommended method of psychological warfare.
- At the start of the engagement, quickly and methodically establish which combat role each mercenary will fill. An example of an acceptable exchange follows:
Quote:A: BRO WHO IS OUR SLAYZORS?
B: ME BRO, I AM OUR SLAYER BRO. BRO.
A: LOL BRO SHUT UP WHO IS OUR SLAYZORS FOR REAL?
B: ME BRO. I'M A SLAYER. I AM RUNNING
C: BRO, [B] IS A SLAYER, BRO.
B: TOLD YOU. SCRUB.
A: LOL
B: LOL
C: LOL
A: BUT WHO IS SLAYZOR FOR REAL?
- Mercenaries often awaken in their clones with a slight disorientation. Studies have proven that an effective remedy for this disorientation is to clearly explain the obvious functionality of commonly used equipment to trigger a feeling of familiarity in your comrade. The most common example of this is for one of the twelve Field Commanders to explain the functionality of a drop uplink in what would otherwise be unnecessary detail.
- Insulting one another creates a sense of camaraderie and reinforces group cohesion.
- It can often be difficult to determine the priority of any given piece of information. To effectively communicate this, first rate the information you are relaying on a scale of 1 to 10, then repeat it that many times. Examples follow.
LEVEL ONE COMMUNICATION wrote:Guys, there are reds at the objective.
LEVEL THREE COMMUNICATIONS wrote:EVE SUPPORT. EVE SUPPORT. EVE SUPPORT.
LEVEL NINE COMMUNICATIONS wrote:EVE SUPPORT. EVE SUPPORT. EVE SUPPORT. EVE SUPPORT. EVE SUPPORT. EVE SUPPORT. EVE SUPPORT. EVE SUPPORT. EVE SUPPORT.
- It is most essential to [redacted]
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